Tuesday, June 26, 2007
#1 I am a natural sweater.
#2 I am on medication that makes me sweat more
#3 I have to walk at least 5 minutes to get to any subway station
#4 I am a natural sweater who is on medication that makes me sweat and I have to walk at least 5 minutes to get to any subway station.
It is seriously embarrassing. My damn eccrine and apocrine sweat glands (that's a little anatomy and physiology talk for you) are on overload and people often stare at me. Some even ask me if I'm ok. And I look up at them with water pouring out of ever pore in my face and say, "Yes, I'm fine thanks." Damn Minnesota nice. Oh well....my co-workers and I are planning a rain dance later this afternoon and we'll pretty sure it'll work. So we're hoping for some great thunder storms tonight and some breezy 70 degree weather tomorrow. Hope all of you are staying cool. Stay away from New York for a few days. We don't need any more bodies heating this place up!!
Sunday, June 24, 2007
The New York Blahs
I love New York City. It is the best place to live in the world. However, when things go wrong in NYC it becomes pure Hell.
So, as Lauren has stated, I work for Broadway general managers (similar to a producer) in Times Square, the busiest, most annoying place in the United States…unless you are visiting, then it is great. Side note, you can tell who lives in NYC when walking through Times Square. Anyone who is walking extremely fast, weaving in and out of the masses of people, muttering obscenities under his/her breath, is living in NYC, the rest of the people are tourists. Anyways, one of my bosses is moving to North Carolina in a week and he needed stuff to pack up his office belongings in. So being the bottom of the totem pole, I am sent to Staples to pick up a 24x20 20 box, a 20x18x18 box, a 30” tall packing tube, and 175 feet of bubble wrap. Despite Staples being 7 NYC blocks away, this shouldn’t have been a problem. But, the boxes, when not put together, are the size of me, and they only come in packs of 3. The tubes come in a double pack. The bubble tape is fine. I can barely carry the stuff. When I finally make it to a register, the cashier decides to say she is closed and makes me walk up the stairs with all of this stuff to the registers up there. Finally, an angry employee rings me up, and I head my way back to work.
As I start walking, the binding of one set of boxes breaks. So I take my fingers and wedge them in between what will become the flaps of the boxes. I’m caring the other set of boxes in my fingertips of the other hand. The tubes are under my chin. And I’m carrying the bag of bubble tape by my pinky. I make it two blocks with multiple stops to rearrange and realize there is no way I can carry this back the next five blocks. So I walk in to the middle of the street and try to hail a cab while still holding all of the packaging supplies for my boss. No cab driver wants to deal with me. 5 in-service cabs pass right by me before I get picked up by a very nice out-of-service cab driver who must feel very sorry for me. He gets me to my location, which is right off of Broadway. This is an extremely busy street, packed with cars and thousands of pedestrians on the sidewalk. I’m trying to unload everything from the cab as quickly as I can. It’s not working. Tubes are rolling in the middle of the street. Boxes falling every which way. I’m a mess. And not one of the thousands of people helped me out to carry something to my destination, let alone just helping me out of the middle of the street. I’m about to get hit by cars, and want to yell at someone to give me a hand, and cry. Eventually I make it back to work. The boxes are partially damaged, but my boss is very appreciative! Probably because he just avoided an hour of Hell.
Then, after work, I’m dying to get back home. I get down to the subway. It’s packed. I’m not getting on until 2 subs arrive at the very least. So I decide to walk the 60 blocks home. As I said before, NYC is the best place in the world. And a 60-block walk may sound terrible, but it is the best thing I do for myself in a long time, until I get to block 55 out of 60. I’m walking under scaffolding on the side of a building that was under repair. And there must be a pigeon up there somewhere, because a huge thing of poop hits my shoulder, splashes on my neck and runs all the way down my arm! Not only am I gagging as I walk home, I have to pass by tons of people sitting outside eating their dinners at fancy restaurants.
This is one of the days, in the best city in the world, where the Devil decided to surface and wreak havoc on us natives. Well at least this native.
-Scott Witebsky (AKA- The Arts Guy)
Friday, June 22, 2007
Thursday, June 21, 2007
This is our friend Sing. Honestly, who looks this cute at 6 am??
Thursday, June 14, 2007
I've got a great New York story for you. SOOO Law and Order SVU (see link...its worth it). So the wife of an acquaintance of Scott was on one of those subway cars that was packed like a can of sardines. Let me just say from experience that those cars SUCK. You're around a bunch of dirty, smelly strangers and you have to be like skin to skin with them. So this woman manages to step into the car as one of the last passengers who fits and is close to the door. She is annoyed to see a "dirty looking" man heading towards her from the platform. He makes it onto the train too, the door closes and while she's standing there, she feels this man grinding up against her. SICK AND WRONG! I told Scott that at this point my elbow would have been in his gut and he would be doubled over in pain. However, this lady apparently doesn't have my violent nature, so she just queasily put up with it until she got off the train.
When she got off, she sort of glanced back to look at the guy and asked herself if she should do anything about it. She had just chalked it up to one of those crazy New York experiences when she gets tapped on the shoulder from behind. She turns around and this very large black man wearing chains is standing behind her. She's thinking Jesus Christ, what now? The man asked "Was there someone on that train who was bothering you?" And she said there was, surprised that anyone had taken notice.
Turns out this guy is an undercover cop and he and his partner have been tracking this sick dirty grinding-strangers guy all day! They first found him suspicious when he would wait at the subway stops and let a bunch of trains go by until a really crowded one pulled up. Then he would get on. Ewwwwww is all I have to say about that. So this wife of my boyfriend's acquaintance (who will remain anonymous) will be testifying at a trial for this guy and they're pushing the trial up because she's moving out of the state in a few weeks. Crazy shiz I tell you. Also, we learned that there is approximately 1 undercover cop on every subway train, most likely (in Scott and my opinion) looking for terrorists. But if they catch guys like this, that's an added bonus. Hotcha! Who would have known??
I thought that story was so great, I had to share it with all of you.
New York Happenings: Volume XII, Part Duex, ANKLE UPDATE
As I'm sure you've all been losing sleep over the status of my ankle injury, I wanted to relieve some of your worry with an update. I saw an orthopedist yesterday who was quite nice and attentive, and it turns out there is no gap between my tibia and fibula (which is a good thing!) That means no ligament rupture. Just a regular ankle sprain that was probably exacerbated by walking around so much. Do you think my insurance will cover cab rides? Cause I sure as hell can't and that's really the only way I could minimize my walking right now. But it is good news. It means no surgery and no more boot!! Acually he was ok with the boot but gave me an aircast instead (see pic above) so that I wouldn't have to lug that heavy boot around everywhere. Honestly, between that and my heavy rolley backpack w/ my anatomy and physiology books in it (3 of them!) I felt like the ghost of Christmas past...lugging my chains behind me. Ok, I can't take credit for that joke. A doctor friend of mine thought of it. But I thought it was quite clever. So there you have it. I will have 4 weeks of physical therapy starting next Friday (God only knows when I"ll fit in 2 appointments a week), and then I'll be as good as new...hopefully. So thanks for your worries, well-wishes and prayers. I am still in one piece!!
Since I have your attention, I have to give an another shameless advertisement for my blog w/ my friend Meredith...our bicoastal cultural comparison blog entitled Bicoastal Bosom Buddies. Mer has been MIA for a week or so for personal reasons but you can still read the NY updates from yours truly including an interesting story involving a man with a bloody eye on a Bronx bus. Lovely. The site is
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Monday, June 4, 2007
"WHAT?!" You say. What is this horrid addition to Lauren's up and coming New York wardrobe?
Yes friends, I have sprained my ankle. Possibly pretty badly (so the podiatrist thinks). It all began like this:
Almost 3 weeks ago now, I was walking down 43rd around 9th and 10th (on my way to the stupid UPS headquarters for reasons I won't get into now but that involve a well-intentioned though idiotic neighbor) and all of a sudden my leg buckled under me and I started to fall over. Though I caught myself, I felt a distinct wave of pain in my foot/ankle because the outside of my foot had inverted and I think I actually stepped o n it with the top of my foot, as if the outside phelange had folder under the rest of my foot...if that makes any sense. I turned around to see what had caused my semi-embarassing-quasi-fall, and saw some concrete that had eroded (like if a weed had grown out of it) and was about 2-3 inches above the rest of the sidewalk. I had stepped directly on it and my ankle had "inverted" , etc. Boo, who can I sue? So I was limping around the next few days but just figured it was a strain or a sprain. I tried to get back to working out, which I had been doing 4-5 times a week since January/February. I've lost 10 pounds so you can imagine my dismay when week 1 went by, and then week 2, and my ankle still hurt when I used it too often, despite my efforts to ice, wrap, elevate, and down bottles of ibuprofen (ok...I had a few a day...pills, not bottles.) So I finally went to the podiatrist on Friday and low and behold there is a gap (called diastasis) between where my tibia and my fibula (the 2 shin bones) are supposed to over lap which is suspicious of a ruptured ligament ( high ankle sprain). Unfortunately in the state of New York, a podiatrist can't treat anything above a certain part of the ankle so I have to see an orthopedist tomorrow to find out if I really did rupture my ligament and what I'll need to do to fix it. Worst case scenario: Surgery. Sick. So keep your fingers crossed that the podiatrist was completely wrong and didn't know what she was talking about and gave me this silly boot for no reason at all.
In other news, Scott got a job this summer working for Stephen Chaikelson, the head of the theater department at Columbia and a broadway producer. He's working doing lots of busy work type stuff but its in the industry that he loves so he is content. He gets to read new scripts, meet some theater-industry people, and hangout with some apparently friendly Canadians.
We have seen lots of great theater lately and will be hosting our 2nd annual Tony viewing party on Sunday after my last choir concert in which we'll perform Bach's B-Minor Mass (beautiful!! If you're in town, come see it; 6/10 at 2pm at Christ of St. Stephen's church on W69th at Broadway). Last year when we hosted this party, we had to rush to put all of our IKEA furniture together in about 4-5 days and in our rush, I put part of our IKEA coffee table on backwards so we couldnt' even use it. It was enjoyable though and I got compliemnts for making a mean taco. This year, we're thinking homemade pizza...and cheering for Coram Boy, Spring Awakening and Grey Gardens (the latter 2 have GREAT music which I highly reccomend).
Lastly, I'd like to introduce all of you to a new blog I am a part of called "Bicoastal Bosom Buddies ". It is a joint blog with my friend Meredith Cain-Nielson (my friend since we were about 3) who lived across the street from me on Ann Lane until she went to college in Cincinatti. I always thought Mer would end up in NY but low-and-behold, she is now living in LA (and staring in an Opera this month!) and I am in NY. So we are writing an experiment in comparitive pop culture and though we've been a bit slow in writing, keep checking back cause we plan on making it a big deal ( http://bicoastalbosombuddies.blogspot.com/) . :)
I hope all is well and if anything interesting becomes of this ankle injury, I'll keep you updated.
Love to you all,